Eight hours sleep, WITHOUT INTERRUPTION - luxury

People often ask mothers of infants if they get enough sleep. I've also gotten that question - many times. Funny how much people start caring about your sleeping patterns when you become a parent.

Anyway, I've always answered questions like that by saying that yes, I do get enough sleep, yes, Noam have been sleeping long nights since the start, and yes, she only wakes up to feed and then falls straight back to sleep again.

I've been lucky, I guess. But this morning, when I woke up after eight hours sleep without any interruption (as Noam slept all night), I still realized how much I've missed that. God it felt nice! I felt so alert and happy when I woke up. A true luxury that I had totally forgotten about during the last five months.

(Eight hours sleep, without interruption, means not waking up because of my husband watching TV or working until late, or waking up when he gets to bed, neither waking up from Noam lying in the bed farting and moving around like a helicopter, or waking up to feed).

My daughter on speed?

The other day I felt a bit naughty. So I had both coffee and a big piece of a very sweet cake.

I don't drink much coffee. And I don't eat much cake. Which is why I'm thinking that maybe it's not the best for my daughters stomach, as it's not the best for mine, as I'm not that used to it.

But, as I said, a few days ago, I had both.

I felt a bit sick afterwards. Should have had a smaller piece. But at least Noam's stomach seemed to be dealing with it without problems.

The rest of her seemed a bit affected though. The kid stayed awake all day! And then the next day again! She barely slept at all, just nodded off a few times.

So either the coffee and sugar actually did give her some sort of rush, or she has a dealer that provides her with some heavy stuff.

Or she just found her Mum so exiting that she wanted to spend as much time with her as possible.

Probably, and hopefully, the last one is most close to the truth. And I don't blame her. I found myself pretty exiting too.

I am a liar

Being a mother seems to go hand in hand with being an involuntary liar.

As soon as I say something it only takes about 24 hours for it to no longer be true.

Yesterday I said that I'm grateful about getting enough sleep and not being tired at all. Today I'm really tired from not having slept much at all, due to my daughter having stomach ache.

The other day I said that my daughter is awake most of the days, nowadays. The next day she ended up sleeping all day.

A few days ago I said that Noam never cries. The same evening my sister was babysitting Noam while my husband and I was supposed to be watching a dance performance. I'm writing "supposed to", as I only got to see in total about ten minutes of the whole performance. This as Noam started crying from hunger as soon as the first part of the performance started, and again as soon as the second part of the performance started, and a janitor had to come and get me twice for feeding.

So, you get the drift, since I became a mother I also have become a skillful liar.

The different roles of the mother and the father

Thinking a lot about the role that society has created for the mother. And the role created for the father.

I love spending time with my daughter. From a selfish point of view I'm almost glad that my husband does not take as much responsibility as I do.

From an intellectual point of view I feel different though. When I think about how much greater society would be (in so many different ways) if we had reached the point were there was equality when it comes to parenthood, I feel different.

The first week or two I was very amazed by biology and how this whole thing of birth and babies work. But I am not a biologist. And now, a few weeks later, I'm starting to see the structures, the social instead of the biological, also in my own situation as a parent.

I decided to talk to my husband about it. This especially after I had read different studies about how feeding is just one of so many different needs that the baby has, just one of so may different things that the baby needs from it's parents.

My husband could be the one doing housework. He could change diapers. He could be carrying Noam a lot more. He could be lifting her up to help her burp if she seems uncomfortable. He could be taking her for a walk in the pram. He could be singing to her. He could be talking to her. And he does all those things. But I do them a lot more.

When I told him this, he still got stuck on the feeding part. And then he starting rabbling on about the fact that it's not really in his nature to sit and talk to a baby, that it's more his thing to play with her.

Funny. Like if it would be my thing. The difference is that I make it my thing, because I know that my daughter needs it.

It all has to do with the fact that a woman is supposed to be the caring and the soft one. A man on the other hand is supposed to be the funny one, the cool one.

And it all has to do with that motherhood is supposed to be this thing that you go in to and totally sacrifice yourself, and no longer care about anything else than the child. There is nothing like that when it comes to the way people look at fatherhood.

A mother caring for her child is average. A father caring is wonderful.

This all has to do with the patriarchal society that we live in. It's all one part of the big puzzle, and that is the reason why change would benefit women.

But change would also be good for men. Not only because of the fact that an equal society is a better society for all parties, but also because men are actually losing out.

It amazes me that men can't see that. That they do not understand that by not fully taking part, they are missing out on something so wonderful that it can't be described with words.

My daughter the goldfish

They say that goldfishes have no memory. That they can't remember what happened just a second ago. They also say that goldfishes can eat themselves to death as they can't feel that they are full.

My daughter definitely share some characteristics with goldfishes. She eats and five minutes later she wants to eat again. And then again, and then again. It's like if she can't feel that she's full and doesn't remember that she just ate.

And when I think about it, her mouth looks a bit like the mouth on a fish also.

There has to be a first time for everything

Today, when mummy, daddy and baby, were on a nice long walk, far away from any place indoors, were it was possible to breast feed, baby decided that that was exactly what was needed.

So mummy almost froze her tits off, sitting on a jetty, breast feeding baby.

And the ducks enjoyed the view.

Screw natural

Have patience with me. Know I haven't written in several days. Will definitely write tonight or tomorrow. Until then, a short post about (surprise) breast feeding.

To avoid mastitis in the breasts they are supposed to be kept warm. To avoid pain, on the other hand, it's good to "air" the breasts as much as possible. A bit difficult to both keep the breasts warm and "air" them at the same time. "Airing" is also a bit difficult when you're constantly leaking.

This thing about breast feeding sure is a bit scientific and does take a lot of time and practicing. Screw people that call it natural.

But I've found the recipe though. Just stay in bed. Wear no top, but keep the boobs warm by a thick duvet. And make sure to have towels close by for when the leaking starts.

God, my blog must be so boring, to most people, at the moment. Have patience with that too. I will surely be able to write about something else that babies, puke, crap and breasts soon.

How can breastfeeding be considered obscene?

Just read, on the site alltombarn.se, via a link on DN:s website, that Facebook is closing accounts that includes photos of women breastfeeding.
The reason is that pictures like that are obscene, according to Facebook.
Honestly, if someone wants to put up photos of their baby and breasts let them do it!
I'm not sure that I would like to put up a photo like that of myself on Facebook, but it sure isn't obscene to do it.
How could it be?